Hey! Take Back Your Adjectives!

I love the change of seasons.  It’s always such a great time to have a change of thought.

It recently dawned on me that everyone has their very distinct personal adjectives…and…they have the right to own them.

I have also recently realized that I am in possession of adjectives that don’t belong to me.  No, I didn’t steal them!  I simply have them clinging to me like lint for the dryer screen of life.  And as a good Samaritan I must return them to their respective owners.

You see, I don’t like to live in the world of chronic drama and trauma, but this last year had a different plan for me.  I was delivered an acute case of the D&T (drama and trauma) over a 90-Day period this summer.  And as you have probably experienced in your own life, when suffering from an ailment, sometimes the messaging gets all convoluted.  So here was mine…

I lost my dad,

I lost my marriage,

I lost my assistant and

I lost my residence.

What a loser!

Hey, wait…That’s a lie!

When I bring back out the adjectives I own, the story changes and the truth comes out.

The truth is…

I’m not a loser… The acute onset of D&T actually utilized all of my best skills…

I am compassionate:  I stood with intention and walked beside my dad as he transitioned out of this life.

I am strong: I held personal boundaries that were necessary in order to heal.

I am a mentor: I willingly trained my assistant to be capable of more.  And she is.

I am at peace:  I created a sanctuary to rebuild grace in my life.  My lease was up and I chose to change my address.

Once my “ailment” was over, I pulled out my box of adjectives and opened it like a child opens a treasure chest.  I noticed interspersed through mine were some that didn’t belong.  They belonged to others that had either passed through or continued to mull about in my universe.

My treasure chest of adjectives!

My treasure chest of adjectives!

Carefully (because some of them are fragile) I pulled the adjectives apart and started the process of separating the ones I own from the one’s I don’t.

Here are mine:

Joyful

Loving

Peaceful

Passionate

Compassionate

Questioning

Dynamic

Grace Filled

Awe Inspired

Helpful

Happy

Full of Laughter

Enough

Loved

And no I’m not a saint.  Not anywhere close to perfection…

My “halo” or “princess tiara” depending on the day, sits jauntily on my head, constantly slipping down one side or another, or rolling off under my desk or down the street.  It is tenuously held by anchors that somewhat resemble horns…but who needs to know that anyway, right?

If my halo rolls too far down the street or under the bed I replace it with my tiara.  I wouldn't want the halo holder/horns to recede from lack of use

If my halo rolls too far down the street or under the bed I replace it with my tiara. I wouldn’t want the halo holder/horns to recede from lack of use

The more important thing is that this is the list of adjectives I hold front and center in my life… The ones that bring me the greatest joy and the ones I aspire to be each day no matter what else is going on.

The others adjectives I own fully are:

Stubborn

Aggressive

Exhausting

Demanding

Expectant

Determined

I was shocked to see unfamiliar adjectives stuck in crevasses of my box.

And as I laid them out before me I realized I had taken them on from those around me and it was time to set them free and give them back to their owners.

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These are the adjectives I’m returning:

Fearful

Sad

Chaotic

Panicky

Unsure

Irresponsible

Unappreciative

Abandoned

Unwilling

Substandard

Oblivious

Selfish

Alone

Undervalued

Overwhelmed

Bitter

Lost

Unloved

This was a bigger event than my annual spring cleaning or fall nesting rituals!

I think it would be a good idea for me to clean out my box of adjectives on a more regular basis.  I will mark my calendar to do just that.

What Would You Find?

So, if you go look in your adjective box right now, what would you find?

What adjectives are yours?

And what adjectives do you need to return?

©2013 aPlungefromtheHighDive
All Rights Reserved

Day 19 of the 30-Day NaBloPoMo Blogging Challenge.  Only 11 more to go!  Woo-Hoo!

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2 responses to “Hey! Take Back Your Adjectives!

  1. Whew! Your blog is some of the juiciest self-work for me!
    I just wanted to read a frickin’ blog! (ever heard that before?)

    Adjectives I’m Giving Back:
    – broken
    – powerless
    – mature (yes, it’s a bad thing)
    – OCD
    – cold/unemotional
    – the strong one
    – manipulative
    – tired
    – incapable
    – the black sheep
    – chunky (ugh…)
    – lost
    – alone

    Adjectives I’m Keeping:
    – warm
    – compassionate
    – fun & playful
    – sarcastic
    – strategic
    – safe
    – dangerous (yes, it’s a good thing and not safe’s opposite!)
    – uncompromising
    – confident
    – powerful
    – beautiful
    – curvy, sexy
    – guided
    – loved & loving
    – supported & supportive
    – intentional
    – stubborn, determined
    – perfectionist (again, NOT a bad thing!)
    – strong
    – sure

    I’m sure you have a few to add to this list, as I do for you!
    But I have to get work done today because I’m “responsible!”
    Lol!

    • Hey we can start an adjective exchange! Bring adjectives in to the group, try them on, keep them if they fit, discard them if they don’t….
      Ummm wasn’t this what we were talking about doing with our closets?

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